TEXT THE BIG SHOW AT 65178

It’s funny when people pause after saying something they think is funny, waiting for a big laugh. Like that last dummy saying she has cleavage in a turtleneck.

my ex had a boob job bf i met her, but she was a bitch. i blame the boobs, but evry1 else just said she was always a bitch

The iphone is not a status symbol… It’s the most powerful, capable, and highest quality mobile device on the planet. That’s why it’s popular. Only a fool would think that owning a $200 device makes them special.

Boob job won’t help Jamie.

That’s what the mouths for

Great Jamie! Now every married woman listening to this show once again will be wondering if this is her husband

You know I like about you Jamie? You are the anti-celeb celeb. BTW: I think you need billboards all over town for your show!

Other guy just a sperm donor to me

No say it aint so!?! ryan and andy make this show tolerable….well mostly ryan.

Gay guy is quitting:( but I love his stupid quotes!!!!

IF YOU HAVE A TEXTING PROBLEM, WE ARE AT 65178

I don’t know why girls are suprised that guys grope them on the dancefloor. The only reason guys go to the club is to hook up with girls.

I was dancing with a guy and he thought it was ok to grab my boob to the beat of the music.

How the heck are you over someone if you’re asking how to get over them

Haha soo brutal to the intern! Soooo funny!!!!

What ever happened to “they’re an ex for a reason”?

You probably have at least 3 drinks before you let him touch you. That 3rd drink is the key…

I hate the group of guys that stand against the wall and just watch all the girls walk by. They never say anything they just act like they are at the zoo

I hate the girls who take their huge ass purses and hit everyone with it. You’re not going camping you’re going to the bar, downsize that bitch to a clutch!

I hate people who own outdoor cats.

If a random girl starts a conversation and at the same time slips her hand and starts playfully tickles your under belly, does that mean anything?

GO TEXT YOURSELF AT 65178

A new theme song for the jamie white show by eminem W.T.P (white trash party) lol

Jamie is the pied piper of crazies!!!!

They can fake the accent, but they can’t fake the foreskin!

Can we talk about DIRTY HOOKERS now??? ugh

When i was 9 my friend and i crank called hooked on phonix and made up fake credit card numbers and they called our parents & tried 2 charge us w/ credit fraud.

Hey my name is melissa and i work at apple, and as long as they keep screwing up their products…I keep my job haha.

I work with a bunch of turds

Tell Ryan to find himself a politician. Nothing like a scandal to keep your life exciting.

Andy, PLEASE don’t play any nkotb today. Thanks!

It’s 6 in the morning!! This bitch is crazy

YOUR CHEATIN’ TEXTS AT 65178

Uggggh. Hope’s songs suck.

It takes a dumb girl to fall for a dum guys lies

Invite her the next girls night!

Her sister is doin him

She needs to just woman up + seduce him!

STOP HATIN on New Kids!!! I was jammin! Lmao!

Tell her to get breast implants

Jamie do you even have feelings

No man says: ‘You hurt my feelings!’ We just let u know in other ways…we’re mean, distance ourselves, or sleep with someone else…

You CAN hurt a guys feelings. I told my then husband that his crotch smelled like moldy towels left in the washer for a few days.

I took a picture of my brother and his best man and pointed out that they had the same bald spot! Aaaahhhh!!!! I didn’t know!!!!

I would take out the markers if they banned my diet coke addiction. I’d nuke one PETA member an hour until they brought it back

Leave Hope alone… Your kid sits to pee.

I taught my son how to pee standing up by putting a corona bottle between my legs and pouring beer into his potty chair. He copied my right away!

This broad confused me… Hang up on her!!

I stopped online dating cause thats where the crazies are!

Your kids a mammas boy

It’s just as bad as goin to the bathroom at a basketball game and seeing a grown man peein with his pants around his ankles at the urinal

It’s a Jew thing..all Jews are a mommys boy or mommys girl…
FIRST DAY OF SUMMER TEXTS AT 65178

My friend has all girls and taught her son to pee sitting on the potty but he is pointing backwards facing back of toilet!!

I’m a 31 yr old guy. I’m so effin tired today that I’m gonna sit to pee.

Talking about your son’s ‘thing’ and you play whitesnake. that’s just wrong…

THE SAVE INTERN SEAN SHOW AT 65178

U CAN’T LEAVE….I can’t pull shawn into the ladies room for shots…

I dont know about other guys, but thats how I get my tan on. While you women enjoy laying out or going to the tanning salon, we work outside with our shirts off\

Want to make a man do something? Two words: oral sex.

I mow my yard in my bikini top and shorts

If you’re a real man, you can walk around shirtless!!!

You’re going to hurt Hope’s feelings! It’s obvious that her main fuction is to be the adult supervision to the kindergarten you call a studio.

Hope boob pics will help ;->

Hope is HOTT. Shawn sells children but he sings. …… Hope is HOTT. More HOPE!!!!!

Keep the baby trader

Maybe 1 of hopes boob weighs more thn shawn!!!!!!

Has shawns dad been with a dirty HOOKER??

Ok Jaime, its time to stop being delusional. The dead cat is not going to bring back the love of your life.

Great t shirt idea. “Dead cats bring love”

Were gonna Show up with bunnie Slippers and nipple rings

TEXT NICELY AT 65178

Does anyone there think the new quizno commercial sound like Ryan singing? Kinda creepy.

This is the first time ever that i agree with ryan

men feet look like hobbit feet

she should just get pregnant, and he’ll commit.

Just have her watch the movie “He’s Just Not Into You”.

My boss gave her husband an ultimatum when she got pregnant. She said quit smoking or I’ll leave and he quit! I tried it on my boyfriend and he laughed!

Usually the people who use the withdrawl method are PARENTS!!!

Hope is still hypnotized!

Talk about intern shawn dammit!!! Im waiting and your show is almost done!

What is she supposed to do? Go out and use her body to plug the hole?

Respectfully,

TEXTS FROM KITTIE HEAVEN AT 65178

u can have my cat Jamie : )

Poor kitty blah blah blah. I have a great image in my head of your little inappropriate outfit! Hahaha!

Hey what’s that chat website called again?*Ill Drink To That!!!*

Ewww jamie!!! I was sittin next 2 u durin the hipnotizing session n u were pantyless!!! Whaaaaaaaa

Kaygull exercises ladies

Some cheerleaders prefer black men, not white boys pretending to be one.

My sisters would give me soda an candy bar 2 go 2 the store 4 tampons i was 12

Omg … I had to buy one of those gurdels ( fat sucker- ins) lol and there was no price so they had to get a price check! Humiliating!

Was doing a super hot beach bikini photo shoot in jamaica. Tons of ppl were watching and two photographers. A huge tide came up and got me all wet and snatched my wig off! I had to chase it in the water! Lmao omg sooooo freaking embarrassed!! Noone knew it was a wig

hated buying tampons too. Now when I buy them I go to the 15 year old boy checker so I know he’s more embarassed than I am.

Buying a vibrator is the worst… They have to turn it on in front of you!!!!

Enough abt animals. lets get it on with dirty HOOKERS

CAN WE TALK ABT. MIDGET PORN! AND DIRTY HOOKERS

GNO HANGOVER TEXTS AT 65178

Hope, you can try your penis power out on me, an I’ll even let you verify!- Scott in Roseville

J, I’m 100% behind you. It gets me hot to hear there dumbassness (it is a word) like literally the top of my head gets hot!

Sex with a goatee is awesome! Why would anyone want him to shave it??

So… Is Taylor the new Tiger Woods?

COMEON TALK ABOUT DIRTY HOOKERS.

Jamie my fianc� loves you but I told her she can never take relationship advice from you because you’re insane!

Jamie my fianc� loves you but I told her she can never take relationship advice from you because you’re insane!

Fat kids|My sister gets defensive about her oldest kids weight but I remember when he was 2 eating full size combos from mcd’s!

shouldnt it also b borderline abuse when two ugly people have kids….Its just not fair 2 the babies….right

Granpa weiners lol lmao

RYAN FREE TEXTS AT 65178

Maybe he saw the baby come out when it was born and just can’t get passed it

She’s not as hot as she thinks she is.

Hope, you can share my son with me! Oh wait…I’m not Jewish…oy vey!

My brothers and sisters use to tell me that my mom found me in a dumpster in Cubaa cuz i’m the only one who looks hispanic

I purse dialed my boyfriends fire station. They answered the phone on speaker to hear me and my best friend talking about how to roll and lite a joint.

My gf told me she had to work a night shift, she butt dialed me at like 11pm and i could hear her and her friends cruisng around in SF talking about them ALL getting high.

Isn’t hope making out with girls and showing her boobs a typical friday?

Are you kidding me? Your gunna ask if your dude is cheating? Of coarse he is gonna say no…

Jamies not having any sex. I cant find any drugs. And you guys aren’t playing any rock and roll…

Jaime quit hiring crazy christians stick to jews